Parents as Teachers: A Love-Hate Thing

Officially, National Parents As Teachers Day celebrates organizations that help parents help their children, especially during early childhood, in healthy development and school readiness.

The official agenda is not without criticism:
• At some point, your child may be identified as "at risk". This could happen when the hospital reports the birth, or it could happen after your child starts school.
• A home visitor will drop by to evaluate your home, family, and child. Your situation will be categorized by risk factors (socio-economic, parental ignorance, parental incompetence, etc). Of course you'll have at least one, because there is no category for "normal" or "healthy". (Well, maybe, depending on the specific program, but I have yet to hear of it.)
• To be a home visitor, one need not be a parent or teacher, only attend a 3-day training program. Three days is deemed sufficient for a complete stranger with no background to evaluate how well you're attending to your child's needs based on as little as a 15-minute visit.
• Parents as Teachers support "early intervention and parental involvement" by lobbying for policy changes at the local, state, and national level.

So people, possibly with no background, come into your home, decide what kind of inept parent you obviously are, and then use your information as part of their "evidence-based model" to show the need for more laws pertaining to parenting.

Alarmist? Maybe.

BUT

In concept, Parents As Teachers raises awareness that parents are the primary teachers of their children, which is as it should be! If a parent is responsible enough to reproduce, the parent should also be responsible enough to promote their own child's well-being, right?

This process starts at home and it starts very early in life. One of the first social skills a baby learns is trust. Babies learn whether they can trust people or not, based on how quickly and consistently their needs are met. That sense of trust is the basis of love. If a child learns he cannot trust, he fails to learn to love. There is actually a physical difference in the brain between a secure, attached baby and one who has learned not to trust. That physical difference prevents a child from being able to understand morals and values later in life - he literally will not understand why some things are right and others are wrong. (See, there are no bad kids. There are kids who can't know better, and kids who have learned that bad is acceptable. There's hope for the latter.)

The second part of the process extends beyond the actual programs. When parents recognize the impact they have on their child's learning, they tend to be more actively involved in their child's education through childhood and into the teen years. Not just academics, although that's a huge part. But aware parents teach family values, heritage, self-esteem, goals, and how to make better decisions. Those are chunks of knowledge that help a person succeed as an adult, so they are ultimately just as important as recognizing early childhood development milestones.

Whether you agree with the official agenda is your call. But I hope you will approve the intent behind it. Kids need all the support they can get.

Tweet