Let. It. Go.

It's Saturday, June 23. Let It Go Day. 

Do we really need a day to remind us to let things go? Apparently at least some of us do. But what are we supposed to let go of? And why?

Really, now, you need me to answer that?

Let go of the negativity that clutters up your emotions and gets in the way of rational thought: judgment (which is usually some kind of fear in disguise), anxiety, frustration, shame, and anger. And for the hundredth time, it's okay to have those feelings, but the point is to experience them and then - you guessed it - let them go. Keeping them around simply isn't healthy.

But, the actual letting-go process - how complicated is it?

It depends. How complicated is it to let go of a wad of paper? Write down a bit about whatever you want to let go of on a sheet of paper. Crumple it up. Let it go, out of your hand and into the trash. Goodbye, garbage.

Or try something else:

• Learn a new coping skill instead of relying on a dysfunctional one.
• Have yourself a good cry and release built-up chemicals that are cluttering your system.
• Whatever negative stuff you're telling yourself, start using a cartoon voice for it.
• Do something positive right away to mentally shift gears.
• Imagine a box in your head labeled "False Expectations." Every time you start to think shoulda/coulda/woulda, put it in the box and put the box up on a shelf.
• Spend energy on something you can actually control. Clean up a little physical clutter. This increases your sense of control, decreases your stress, and is productive, all at the same time.
• Take a step back and remember that by continuing to emotionally invest, you're living up to the definition of insanity - doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results.
• Take personal responsibility. Maybe a situation occurred that was not in your control, but your response is. Own it. Focus on what you could have done better to improve the outcome.
• Incorporate a new stress management technique into your daily routine.
• Laugh. Laughter soothes tension, eases pain, and improves your immune system. Plus, a good comedy is distracting and allows you to shift your focus.
• If you just can't let it go, try a different means to a similar end. Letting something go doesn't mean you must forget all about it and never think of it again. It's like telling yourself "Don't think of a pink elephant." And having read that, what did you just think of? Right. That's not what letting go is. If it helps, change the words to "Let it be." It already is or has been, and none of your reaction is going to change that. So let it exist as it happened, but without maintaining your emotional connection.

Ultimately, you have three options: accept the situation gracefully (this doesn't mean huffing around saying "ok, but I still don't like it"), change the situation by being proactive, or - again, you guessed it - let it go.

Remember the monkey bars? At some point, you have to let go so you can move forward.